A Light Hearted View on Why We Need Accountants

We might rile accountants as much as we want but the truth is we need the bean counters. Can you imagine what a shambles life would be without accountants? Or just counting. What If we could not keep track of anything at all? A bunch of Manchester accountants postulated the following theory.

Imagine if you will a world where no one knew how much. No idea whether you were making a profit or loss from battering your cow for a garden hoe. A world where there was no value. That would be pretty messed up! That is the real origin of accountancy; the need to attach value and the need to have a standard means of measuring value. The first accountant kept these values straight!

But we are a long way from Stonehenge. Accounting practices have evolved with the world or as the Manchester accountants claim the world has evolved because of accounting. In the increasingly complex world of finance, accountants are no longer the boring guys in the back office. They now command corner offices and fat paychecks and for a good reason. They still keep everything straight only that in today’s world it’s not cows and garden hoes.

We need them to catch the greedy fat cats whom we catch with their filthy paws in the cookie jar. It is called forensic accounting. Accountants pore over columns upon columns of raw data and confirm to your solicitor that your partner is actually siphoning cash out of your joint holdings either personal or business. They come in during divorce proceedings to keep the numbers straight so that no one gets shortchanged.

As you grow financially the obligations to various causes and interests increases with it. But none so much as to government. To avoid even the remotest possibility of enjoying the hospitality of the state we need accountants to make sure that we pay the state what we owe and to avoid any excesses of this state in eating up our hard earned money! They call it tax accounting.

Mostly though if you are in business then you know that bookkeeping is a terrible bore especially if you do not have the head for it. But you enjoy making those quilts that you sell or developing those video games and playing them for hours in the name of testing them! You still have an obligation to keep your records straight. It is the law! Those pesky Manchurians call it bookkeeping and they can even verify that the information you give them is accurate if you have a rudimentary record in place. They call it audit and keep it straight for you!

The bottom line is that we need them even more than we need to poke fun at them! They keep everything straight regardless of what you want to do. Whether you want to start a business, expand a business, file your tax returns, raise funds, or straighten out your payroll. As long as there are numbers in it you will probably need to consult an accountant.

So these Manchester Accountants do know what they are talking about after all. We do need the bean counters! I guess that is why they call accounting the language of business. Do not get dumbstruck.

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